The 8th on 8th st

 Went to bed late, after finishing up things at work. 

Heard my meditation but got distracted, fell asleep eventually.no dreams worthy to note. 

missed turn and ended up on freeway. No complaints. Marvelous views of the city  Amazing moon, beautiful everywhere! 

Got to parking lot. Walked around townsend. Went for a latte at Pete’s on 8th street. Walked to 7th, up stairs to 2nd floor, waiting at room 31… 

I’ve been noticing the numbers, all the numbers that show up everyday in our daily labyrinth and we don’t notice.

6:50 am woke up

down on fulton turn on 10th 

exit at 7th 

coffee at 830 on 8th st 

walked back to 7th 

go up 2 

room 31

A more exciting day in the court room, heard the accused’s testimony. I made my judgement already, since the day I saw him, without knowing anything about the case. I could tell. Easy soul to spot. 

Enjoyed everything about it this morning. Made lots of mental notes. His testimony, his side of things, another labyrinthine with numbers and rooms and half given instructions. A reflection of the entire week for me. The system, designed to avoid any chaos or disorder, built to predictably, yet, so built to perfection: room numbers, phone numbers, juror #, time of arrival, break duration, officers, signs, arrows, buttons… all designed for us to find the way through the labyrinth, yet, we all managed to get confused, lost and trapped, calling the numbers on walls, following the signs, no one answers, there is no exit? is there anyone here that knows how to fuck to get out of here? 

Will write more about it later.. lots and lots of material! This might’ve been expensive and chaotic and I might be exhausted but I am loving every second of it. 

Walked around for an hour taking photos- if job asked I said I went to eat, they will understand that. Is a human needed that can’t be denied- but they faill to see the human needed of feeding your soul. 

Back to Pete’s on 8th. Will stay here until the work day is over, tired of driving around- this will be my break.

Thinking on how the more these jury days became a routine, the less chaotic. Although I made an error earlier, and got off the freeway, I knew exactly where to go and where to park. I know not to put my parking ticket on my pocket, put it safe in wallet. I know how to get to the stairs, which floor to go, which turn to take and which one is room 31. I know where to go for parking ticket validation, which coffee stop to go to for wifi, quiet work space. Knowledge has accumulated after a series of small failures and disasters. No matter how well signalized and explained the labyrinth is, it takes a couple of trial and error for it to function as intended. I've gained much for this experience. Is like a present for the universe. The universe knows I am not a conformist or a fragile persona. I grew up in an anti-fragile environment, this is my habitat. I know the benefits of unpredictability, chaos and disorder.

(just remember a dream from last night, I am scrolling through social media and suddenly I see a huge picture of Rina, the ex of Walter. It was a portrait photo someone posted, not Rina. She looked amazing, young and beautiful as ever! I remember thinking in my dream: “In the past I would’ve been jealous” 

I see how my dream is projecting my subconscious