Last night, I finished work, read book Antifragility, went to gym, worked out of hour and half. Came home, had dinner: plant based tacos. Played Chess. Spent the rest of the night moving and organizing my oil painting studio. I have to keep moving, and finish it up soon, so I can continue painting.
Fell asleep listening to my meditation. Woke up a couple of times. Fell asleep again. Had a dream that I was going to take the train with Mr. Rossi. We were going to see a play, someone we both knew. I couldn’t tell if Mr. Rossi was in a good or bad mood. Later, remembered that this was always the first work inquiry among us employees: is he in a bad or in a good mood today?
Little that I knew that I would be asking the same type of question about every boss, every manager, producer that I worked with.
This morning, ever seemed to be in a bad mood. Including me! what put me in a bad mood? the old lady I caught in the mirror this morning. Mentioned it to S on the way to work. He immediately agreed with strange enthusiasm.
Someone beeped at him, and the set off the tantrums! He kept it going for 2 blocks. Unnecessary.
Took the car and drove to Hall of Justice parking lot. I didn’t want to make the same mistake as yesterday, so I was paying attention to the lanes. Noticed I was in the wrong one and change immediately. Cut the flow of the car behind me. Lady got upset, sped up around me. Turned out she was going to exact same place. Drove right behind her to the parking lot. Walked to 8th and Brannon, how different I feel today.
Walked to Peet’s for coffee. Will work here, as I have to be near the courthouse in the event I am needed.
As I walked I noticed shadows, reflections, but wasn’t as Inspired as days before. My left foot seemed to hurt a bit.
Arrived to the coffee place, approached the counter to pick up latte. There was an asian younger man holding a long chain, at the end a dog. I had to step around him to reach my coffee. The dog crossed in front of me and I nearly tripped.
The man yelled at me, “What’s your problem?” followed by the shaking of his head, and muttering other words under his breath.
I ignored him and sat down. He walked outside, but from outside he kept looking at me and shaking his head.
Bad mood! He is in a bad mood today…wonder what caused it? Did he also see himself in the mirror today and encountered an older version of himself? Across from me sat a group of gentlemen in their fifties, some nearing sixty. They wore nice suits and carried laptops, sitting around the table drinking coffee and talking as if they were in a bar having a beer.
What struck me was how familiar they looked. I could have sworn I’d encountered a similar group of men in S.F. a hundred times. They were not the same, of course, but the imprint seems to be the same, like a stamp, a photograph permanently pressed into time.
Thinking about Ed… we had similar inspiration. Is it odd that learning how he struggled with his paintings uplifted my soul?
A few things we have in common:
- We were both drawing since early age
- We wanted to study fine art, family convinced us to go for commercial art
-Went for months without painting because didn’t know what to paint
- Had zero interest in socializing with the art world
- No children, dedicated his life to his art
- Got most of his inspiration from his commutes to the city.
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